Spendthrift: A word that doesn't mean what it sounds like it does

So my spending lockdown has resulted in me not leaving my house in order to avoid accidental spending. If I am exposed to society I will buy something. Outside world=Krista buying stuff. Not theory but indisputable fact. It appears to be unavoidable. However, staying home isn't foolproof either. I have found that being able to get anything I want online usually results in spending even more. When everything is virtual I get lulled into thinking the price is an intangible virtual non-reality. Until the "non-reality" becomes my actual credit card bill.

Even if I'm not online, I'm thinking about things. Things I need, things I want, things I want to need.

I know right now I FEEL like I haven't spent a penny but I know that isn't exactly so. It is kind of like the time I tried to do a fast/cleanse. On weight watchers food=points and I am allowed 18-23 points per day. On the day that I was "fasting" (and I really did feel like I had barely eaten) I ended up eating 20 points. That's right, for those of you counting at home, my "fast" was a normal day's worth of food.

So it is with my spending "lockdown." I feel like I'm not spending because I'm not buying anything I like. Just because I hate doing laundry, doesn't mean there isn't $10.00 worth of quarters being spent on it every week.

It is sad that I have to quarentine myself and disable the internet in order to "save" money. PS and by the way, window shopping isn't shopping. It is a form of torture. Right up there with waterboarding. Yes, waterboarding is torture and anyone who thinks it isn't is "fasting" on 4000 calories a day. Lying to one's self doesn't make it the truth.

They say dieting is really supposed to be a "lifestyle change" otherwise you just end up gaining back the weight plus some. I'm sure this applies to my spending habits as well. However, I just can't see this as anything but temporary. A "lifestyle" where I can't get new stuff seems laughable. I know myself and as much as I want to change my financial ways, we all know there is a binge coming and I can't wait to tell you what I get.