Excuse me sir, 1993 called...

Driving home today I graciously let a man walk across the street (and by gracious I mean I didn't want to get a ticket for not stopping for a pedestrian). Since he was so freaking slow, I had time to stare at him. I didn't have my edit button on and I said rather loudly "Hey, fanny pack." My windows were mostly closed but I don't think that would have stopped me anyway.

Hearing it come out of my mouth it sounded like an insult. Probably because it was. Now don't get me wrong, the fanny pack is a genius idea; all that hands free convenience, carries more than a wallet yet less than a purse. Totally useful and uber practical. I can understand someone being blinded by its usefulness and completely unable to see that it is a trend that went out hard. Really really hard.

I feel especially bad for men. They are expected to walk around with everything they need in their pockets. It used to be that their only option was a back pack or a briefcase (both of which have very specific connotations). However, the advent of the "man bag" or "murse" has opened the door for men in such a way that they should never reach for the fanny pack again. Now I've heard some resistance to the murse so might I suggest a nice leather or canvas cross body messenger style bag. It is classic, timeless and useful without being pretentious. I mean seriously, if you were able to wear a fanny pack, you should be able to wrap your head around this idea.

Sporadic use of the fanny pack is ok. For instance if you are power shopping in a filthy downtown wholesale area where there are pick pockets, a fanny pack would be a good idea. However, that is the exception to the rule. And no, I don't care if it is a high end, designer fanny pack.

Please stop arguing with me.

PS- I had a fanny pack and I could never figure out what to wear with it. Talk about looking fat. Pardon me while I strap this fake belly around my own fat stomach and then I'll put this sweatshirt over the whole thing. What do you mean when am I due?

I know it sounds gross but it is really quite pretty.

For anyone still counting, I haven't given up my dream of purple and blue eyeshadows. I realize most hues oxidize on my lids and make me look kind of tired and corpse-like but there are thousands of different shades and I'm certain I will be able to wear one of them. I've been told that perhaps I should stick with violets instead of eggplant so I went and got that (Mac Creme de Violet) and I also found a dark purple/reddish color if you can imagine. Stila Pigalle. Sephora online describes it as a "deep shimmering wine." Here is a picture of it but you should really see it in person to get the effect. It looks much lighter here:
So, I put both on my lids and I have to say I love it. The effect is kind of bruise-like but a really pretty bruise. Ummm let's see, more like a fresh bruise as if someone just clocked you super hard. Deep purple red.

Who would have thought?
The really important lesson here is sometimes you just have to keep experimenting because you never know what you will end up loving.