Hiyaaaaytus

I took a hiatus. It was a necessary thing. I had a lot of tv watching to catch up on. I deprive myself of small pleasures when I feel I have a lot of obligations. I just power through and then when I get a ton of stuff done or finish a huge project, I reward myself with tv watching and full on escapism.

Vacation for me is pretending my bed is an island...well actually my apartment because the pugs suck at refilling coffee.

And now it is November. Time to start a new diet that will allow me to lose enough weight so that if I gain anything over the holiday season, I'll still just need to lose that last 7lbs. So, if my math is correct, I have 25 days to lose 15lbs and 37 days to prevent gaining it back. It is a complicated formula. Don't feel bad if you can't make sense of it.

On another note, I managed to lose my concealer. It's just gone. I thought maybe that was a sign that I should try to be less dependent on the art of concealing. So I tried going without it. I still wore eyeshadow and mascara (of course) and an illuminating tinted moisturizer but no under eye or blemish coverage. As an added challenge I had to stop picking at my face because I could no longer hide the evidence.
Clearly I'm a serious and dedicated journalist.

I even had to go out of my apartment a few times and I felt like everyone was staring at me.
It was really tough but I dug down deep and kept going. I thought maybe I would learn something on this journey, something important about myself. Maybe in my stripped down state I would be more accepting of the real me and it would be freeing somehow.

After a week the only thing I learned was that I need concealer. Why would I choose to look tired? That just seemed silly.

This new concealer I got from The Balm doesn't just conceal but it also fights wrinkles!

I can even wear it to bed!

Life is good.

How to not eat when you really want to (but aren't hungry at all)

No matter what diet you are on (and I've tried them all) there will come a time when you need to avoid temptation and triggers. Here are some tips and tricks, do's and don'ts to skillfully distract yourself from falling off of the diet wagon. Try at least three in a row before mindlessly eating something.

Drink a HUGE glass of water. More than you even think you can consume. If your stomach is rumbling eat a couple of antacid tablets and drink some more water.

Call a friend. Preferably one that is also on a diet and will tell you "no" in a really firm voice. Talk about how hard it is. Venting helps.

Clean your apartment. As soon as you go into the kitchen grab some cleaning supplies and start cleaning instead. Not only will you put off eating for a while longer, you will burn some calories and have a clean apartment.

Someone at a Weight Watchers meeting said she bent down and picked up magazines during commercials.

No offense, but that is really lame.

Fast forward through commercials or leave the room. No one needs to see all those delicious fast food temptations. During those intervals brag to yourself about how well you are doing. Tell yourself how proud you are for not giving in to temptation. You can't disappoint yourself after a pep talk.

Put on really tight clothing. You won't want to make yourself more uncomfortable by eating.

Brush your teeth or chew sugar free, minty gum.

Work on a project that involves your hands. Paint, make jewelry, scrapbook, assemble small things.

It is also helpful to gross yourself out. Imagine eating bugs or some other vile thing.

Don't have a "Sex in the City Marathon." While it is the greatest show ever, all they do is eat. A fact that is magnified when you watch them all in a row. Instead pick a show like "Angel" where all they eat is blood.

Go to sleep. If you just woke up, drink some nyquil and knock yourself out again. Never mind if you have things to do. You can do stuff when you are skinny.

It may sound like I'm kidding but I assure you I am not.

Happy Independence Day! Celebrate your independence from food.