iphone. Private. Do not read.

I think I need some clarity on this whole iphone photo etiquette thing. I personally think of my iphone photos as a private diary of my craziness that I will selectively show someone a small portion of.

However, every time I hand the phone over to prove that yes I did put a sequin bow tie on the pug and he liked it, people start flipping though ALL my photos. I guess I don't blame people, the iphone makes it all too easy and fun to do so. I actually blame myself for thinking people won't do that.

I never would, but that is probably because I take crazy embarrassing pictures with mine. They act like it is the most natural thing in the world and I just want to snatch it out of their hands and scream "NOOOOO" but I'm the dumb ass who handed it over so that wouldn't be polite. Instead I go into a high pitched narration of what they are viewing as if that will make it more normal and understandable.

"Oh, I was trying to see if my makeup would show up in pictures."
"Um that is me taking a picture of my Kate Moss hair."
"Uh, I thought that pee stained fire hydrant was pretty."
"those are the pugs wearing sweaters."
"that is the pug and Rose wearing twin sweaters"
"Ah, that's a homeless woman trying to brush some amazing bed head hair."
"Yeah, that's funny (or not) because that guy is wearing all pink."
"yeah, um, that's me and my sister taking 'how fat are my thighs?' pictures"
"Oh, that's me trying to take before pictures of my wrinkles so I can see if the mushrooms are working."
"you take mushrooms?"
"yes, but not that kind, ok I need to erase these I'll just take that phone back now..."

I mean really! No unauthorized flipping! I know what it looks like, that's why I don't want you looking!
I'm aware that what I see as a social or fashion experiment others may see as a trip down the river narcissism. It is like I'm a teenager again having my inner most thoughts completely misunderstood.

Why am I too lazy to just erase the damn things. That, I think, is the real question.

Krista's summer vacation pt. 1

I was given an unpaid and unexpected vacation!

From the internet.

I was gone for almost a week and let me tell you, it was something.

I can't wait to tell you all about it.

It sucked. What a crappy vacation.

I don't think I would choose to go back. I do have a fabulous iphone but let's face it, it isn't a computer so I had to keep everything to the necessities. Which essentially means I read my emails and then forgot to answer most of them because I wasn't really able to type back an appropriately verbose response. I hit Rose's internet cafe once (thankfully it was open late) but it isn't the same as using your own computer (it isn't my own bed, my own pajamas etc.) and it is really distracting when you are surrounded by cute clothes, wedding plans, and fun chit chat. Web surfing is really a solitary sport.

In the end, it turned out alright. I got a lot out of it and I tried to pretend it was really freeing or whatever people say to sound cup half full and stuff.

Well enough of the whining. Mercury and its lingering retrograde effects should finally be gone for awhile. I read that on astrologyzone.com before my brownout for anyone whose keeping track.

Here are some things I accomplished/discovered while on vacation:

If there is anyone who doesn't clip shit out of magazines everytime you read them you should really start. Why? Because it is fun. You can keep a file of inspiring or striking things and go through them when your internet is down.

I have a picture of Kate Moss from the August 2008 Vogue issue. I liked her hair. So I attempted to recreate it on my own head. It really turned out to be more "reminicent of" than a "recreation of" but whatever, that still counts and it made for a "very special" Tuesday night at work.

You will notice that Kate is in a limo while I am not. I believe the difference ends there.

I also discovered the Camera Bag application on my iphone. Truly the greatest. I'm in love with their many hip and beautiful filters. My self portrait above has the "Helga" filter on it. I look way cooler with it.

More on my vacation adventures to follow. There really is too much to put in one blog entry.

As you can see it was an exciting whirlwind of a time.

Although I am glad to be back.