There is a point in here somewhere...

I've come to accept that even at my age I am going to suffer some bad skin days and breakouts. Actually, let me re-phrase that, I have come to expect it. I haven't really accepted anything. Now true, Alicia Silverstone is promoting her new book, Kind Diet, where she asserts that her skin just "glows" because of her vegan choices. Her skin does look amazing and I'm positive that right after I finish the Fast track detox again next week, I will give that one a go.

I'm always on board for a new diet, I'm sorry, I mean "lifestyle."

Who knows, maybe she's right and being a healthy vegan does wonders for your skin and it has nothing at all to do with gazillions of dollars and excellent facials and expensive products. I don't know. I'm skeptical considering Dr. Perricone's difficult to follow, but ultimately successful Wrinkle Free diet is heavy on the fish and really did improve my skin. I've never lived a vegan lifestyle so I guess I can't compare it equally at this point. I wouldn't mind seeing the two battle it out on Oprah, however. His diet has tons of expensive supplements. I wonder how Alicia stacks up. It's all expensive that's for sure.

I'm still totally in. There isn't much I wouldn't try for beautiful skin.

Actually, that isn't really my point. I got a little sidetracked.
My point is, if I'm having a bad skin day, it hardly seems fair that I would also have an incredibly painful zit inside my nose as well. Ok, logically, Alicia I know that it makes sense (why is she yelling?), but in terms of fairness it seems they shouldn't both occur at the same time.

Would you rather have an incredibly painful inside the nose zit that no one can see, or an ugly but totally not painful zit on the outside of your nose?

That is my point/question.

Advertising works. It just plain works.

The power of suggestion is amazing. I had brushed my teeth. No intention of eating again this evening. I start reading Jessica's blog about baking and of course I want baked goods. No surprise there. Her pictures are amazing. But I don't have any baked goods in the house.
I'm no fool.

Well eventually it gets to me and I go into the kitchen and eat toast with honey. It certainly isn't a gourmet cupcake or a flipping chocolate croissant (I would kill for one of those) but it's bread and that is the closest thing I have.

Rose just called and bemoaned that she had Mexican food two nights in a row and ate the chips.

I'm eating tortilla chips as I type.

Cruel cruel world.

A retrospective, in receipts

The problem with doing my taxes so early is that I'm not quite ready to face the cold hard truth about my year as reviewed through my expenditures.

Since I'm not really great at keeping my calendar/log/journal, my receipts are the only real marker for how I spent my time as well as my money. This Quicken thing is a killer. Categorizing is kind of my worst nightmare and I'm pretty sure I'm not even doing it right. I can't imagine what my retrospective would look like if I actually used this software to its fullest potential. Basically I think it is genius to be able to download all my transactions from various financial institutions so I'm not typing everything into a spreadsheet. I am aware that it is like buying a fancy computer and then just using Word. I know I should learn to really use Quicken. Learning about finances did move up to #2 on my list this year. I've also heard there is a 2010 version of Quicken for mac coming out soon. I do love new stuff. So perhaps this will be the year.

I do know how to run a report to get my category totals. So yes, I am awesome. I flirt with the button that says it will show me my finances in graphs and pie charts but I never actually do it. Which is weird because I love pie. Truth be told I am terribly frightened of seeing a giant pie that says "clothing - kl" with just a tiny sliver of important stuff like "retirement." Again, I am awesome.

The retrospective usually goes something like this:

"huh, did I ever wear that shirt?"
"what the heck did I buy there?"
"Oh, I love that dress, why don't I wear that more often?"
"Ok, enough hair products. That budget is getting cut this year...that reminds me I'm low on pomade."
"That's right, I haven't worn that because I never did find the right top for it. Keep looking."
"Yeah, I never could get out of the house in that."
"This sucks. I could be watching Grey's Anatomy."
"Why don't I sell some of this shit on ebay?"
"If I just did my shopping by deductible category, this would be so much easier."
"I really didn't go enough places this year to wear all this."
"Yes, that outfit only had one outing but I still think it is classic."
"No, really. What was I thinking?"
"Gosh these pugs cost a lot of money. Well, the bee costume was a necessity."
"Oh fun. I painted the apartment last year. I really should finish those shelves."
"Why haven't I collaged that table yet?"
"Holy crap on the craft supply hemorrhage! I cannot buy another thing until I use up every last thing I have."
"All in all I have very little to show for my year."

I really do need to keep a more lively journal because this shit is depressing.

What to wear

What does a girl wear to her first day at the firing range?

It's a really tough call. Do you go for irony and wear something really girlie like a dress? Is there any kind of dress code? I don't think so. I think irony (or maybe paradox) is better served if you are already proficient with a gun. OK, something with more of an edge then. However, not too much of an edge because the unmet expectation would just be embarrassing. Comfort should probably be a priority...I feel it is important to avoid that Cagney & Lacey/NYPD blue, detective, blazer thing. That feels wrong somehow.

Other factors, it's raining and cold.

Additionally, I can't forget to take into consideration my accessories are eye protection, ear protection and a gun.

Hmmmmmm

A zillion discarded shooting outfits later I finally went with the pair of the wide leg jeans I recently got hemmed, a long (to mid thigh) black turtleneck, and combat inspired boots.

As for the shooting, I was surprised to discover:
Guns are heavier than I expected
I am jumpier around loud noises than I thought
It isn't as easy as the movies make it look
It would be uncomfortable to shoot a gun while wearing a police uniform
I have a new respect for anyone who carries a gun professionally
I'm not that good at it
I'm not totally horrible at it

I absolutely plan on doing it again.

Fashion ingenuity applauded and then criticized just a little

We are in the midst of a torrential downpour and today I spied a woman wearing a plastic Target bag as a skirt! GENIUS. Actually it was over pants so it was more like "pants skirt." If I wasn't driving I would for sure have snapped a picture but I was afraid I would splash her with a wall of water in my attempt.

I sincerely applaud her ingenuity.

However, the whole thing was fueled solely by practicality and I feel if you are on the path to greatness you should really go all the way.

I'd like to explore her options:

The bag was one of the mid sized large ones you get when you buy pillows or a puffy throw. So it turned out to be a kind of boxy, below the knee skirt. You could use the small standard size bag to create a cute mini skirt or one of the really big long bags to do a cocktail length number.

She wore it handle side down and I'm guessing she cut a small hole in the bottom and then pulled it over her head so the hole was small enough not to fall over her hips. Is it unfair to say that it would have added a little something special if she had knotted the handles a couple of times?

Now, what if you put your legs through a small hole in the bottom of the bag and tied the handles together around your waist so that it stayed a little tighter around the legs creating a tulip skirt? Nice.

Or what about double bagging and then pulling the handles up from the bottom giving you a bustle or pouf skirt thing going on? I like it.

Obviously Target isn't the only bag you can use but if you have bright, shiny red rain boots then it just seems obvious.

Here's something weird that I didn't think of until now, while she did have an umbrella, she didn't roll up her pants at all and she wasn't wearing rain boots. Why take such innovative measures to protect your pants from waist to knee, but do nothing to protect your pants from the knee down? I'm going to strongly suggest tights and rain boots to really make this outfit both super cute and practical.

On a final note, Target bag skirt lady didn't seem as proud of her invention as I would have been. I would have been strutting around like I was all that and then some.

It's like she doesn't even know how awesome she is.

That is just heartbreaking.

I'm sorry, what?

It is pouring rain here and rain makes me think.
So, I was in the car and it occurred to me I really don't understand the deal with churches that have the giant red awareness ribbon on them. What are they trying to say? That they are focused on AIDS awareness? That they are crusaders in the fight against AIDS? "People with AIDS welcome here?"

Why would they spend all that money on a giant metal sculpture? Wouldn't that money be better spent on research or the massively expensive cost of the medication for their afflicted parishioners whom they may or may not have enticed into their church with their humongous red ribbon?

I really don't get it. But then again I don't really get church either.
And there are a lot of these red ribbon churches. I saw three on my short ride home.

And now for some breaking news...

I just read in Oprah Magazine that "people with thighs less than 24 inches around face a higer risk of heart disease." Apparently thigh fat might help flush the blood of something bad and helps you live longer.
And and and
"The antioxidants in chocolate have beneficial effects on blood pressure." Not just dark chocolate either, they actually said Toblerone (shut the F up).

Pretty sure I'm living forever.

Yes, I do know there was an earthquake in Haiti. Stop yelling at me.