The beginning of November is usually a time of hope and optimism for me. At this time of year I plan on getting all my holiday shopping done early, all of my loose ends tied up, my finances in order, my house cleaned and organized and everything in my life exactly as it should be (whatever the flip that means). It is as if I believe that every December 31st, I will expire and I must be ready (for what I am not sure).
I never ever actually get even close to meeting these lofty goals and they are therefore transferred to my New Year's resolution/to do list. Every year I think I am being proactive and on top of things and then suddenly it is Christmas and I haven't really gotten anything done.
I am always so surprised.
This time of year seems proof that time isn't linear but bends in the most obnoxious way. It can't possibly be my fault.
I'm aware of the pattern and yet every year I can't help but think "this year it will be different." So here I am, thinking about the gifts I will or will not be able to afford to give and how I might make personal and unique gifts as a way to make up for their inherent frugality.
If I do actually buy gifts way ahead of time, I usually forget that I've gotten them only to find them way after the fact. However, if I do think of a really special homemade gift, it is usually far too late in the game to make it a reality.
Because I have to mail all my gifts it would really behoove me to get it done early (and I know this) but I usually end up spending as much for shipping as I spent on the gift itself because I am apparently a hopeless procrastinator.
You would think that all this knowing and planning would help. But it doesn't.
I should probably just accept the fact that it will be the same this year.
But I won't.
This charade is clearly a nice, warm, familiar blanket.
How will I know it is Christmas without it?
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