Monday, April 26, 2010

I'm a Lady

I was at a stoplight and crossing in front of me was a cross dresser. Now, I can COMPLETELY understand why a man might want to dress in women's clothing. Women have fantastic options. "Sky's the limit" variety and so much more latitude than men have. Bearing that in mind, I ask you, obvious man in women's clothing, WHY???? Why, did you choose THAT? (I am using caps because I am, in fact, screaming).

I mean really, forget that you have the worst, scraggly, almost to the shoulder, please get some highlights, filthy dishwater hair. Let's just forget the "comfy" old sandals. Forget that you have a 5 o'clock shadow. Forget that you are a man. Forget all of that.

Why are you wearing an oversized, women's, polka dot, sailorish style blouse with a HUGE bib type collar on top of a shapeless, elastic waist, to the ankle skirt (I am surmising about the waist given what I can see coming out of the horrifying top that hits at the worst part of the hip).

WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?

There is so much to pick from. Our clothes are awesome and I bet you feel more like your true self in them. Whatever.

YOU ARE ROYALLY FUCKING THIS UP.

So either do this better or wear your own sex's clothes. I am not kidding.
I feel you can do less harm in them given the inherent limitations of men's clothing.

Why why why don't I carry my phone with the camera mode on at all times? I am so mad at myself. So I guess, man in the worst choice of girl clothes ever, we are both a little wrong today. I think I have learned. I fear that you, however, are a lost cause.
(that is, unless I see you again).

ps: I love you Little Britain. I love you.

2 comments:

  1. now that you've got me looking at you again... I've re-read your old bloggy note and it reminded me that I had me chapped lips last month and I wore the salve of neo-sporin on my lips... they cleared right up. As for the hideous x-dresser, pink polka dots need to be worn with the correct cutesy hair-do... something perky & short... but the sailor thing is a no-no.

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